[full of it]

when it’s over, you kill time

Posted in Uncategorized by susieyarbs on January 26, 2009

morning classes over.  only two kids in my tumblers class, one girl probably needs to move from tumblers into level 1 rec.  the next class was a tots class, and i almost lost my mind.  there were six kids, one kid who’s WAY too young to be in the class (and whose parents brought him back even though last week kate told the dad to move him into parent participation), and one girl who i’m pretty sure doesn’t understand english very well.  a remarkable number of these kids speak russian at home.  wha?  welcome to san francisco/we’re not in texas anymore, sweetheart.  anyway, i had to spend most of the time running after those two kids, so the four others who were actually paying attention were bored out of their minds.  surprise surprise, after seeing that there’s only one unfortunate coach for this class, the parents of the four good kids moved them into the class that starts half an hour earlier, leaving me with just the two awful kids.  well, not awful, just misplaced.  unruly.  good kids.  anyway, i can manage two difficult kids if they’re all i have to worry about.

i think that in ten years, if i’m thinking back on this particular period of my life, it will be titled KILLINGTIME or TAPPINGTOES or HOLDINGBREATH or IMPATIENCE or you get the idea.  this is starting year two of jobs i don’t care about, still without any solid accomplishment to my name since graduating.  in the realm of “us,” i’m absurdly happy, so content with where we are, excited for the future, et cetera.  but for me, it’s going to be another year and a half before i’m into any sort of career, working a job that isn’t temporary and juvenile, and it seems SOFAR.  i’ll say this with the preface that i in no way regret moving out here, that this was the perfect opportunity at the perfect time, but i do get depressed to think that if we’d stayed in tx, i could be in the middle of my first year of teaching right now.  i could actually be contributing financially, i’d have something to say when someone asks what i do.  maybe this is some sort of minor identity crisis, a discrepancy between what i am and what i think i should be.  so i just end up feeling like i’m killing time until i can do something real.  

ok i think i’m done complaining.  in work news, i picked up 2, possibly 4 more classes.  all rec, level 1 and 2.

in apartment news, it’s still unbelievably filthy.  cluttered, not filthy.  doesn’t matter, i need to clean it either way.  i also need to mail my muni ticket form.  stupid ticket.  hopefully they’ll drop it, because i don’t really feel like giving them $50.  i also need to mail my mom’s christmas/birthday presents (yes, i still haven’t sent her christmas present.  lay off).  

i’m gonna get to it.  maybe have some more coffee.  yes.

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One Response

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  1. French Friend for Life said, on January 26, 2009 at 8:56 pm

    I understand your situation. I am definitely having the identity crisis minus the career/ job. The last week or so have been tough b/c I’m feeling down about not contributing financially and also being unbelievably bored. I’m now on the look out for a part time job…wish me luck!


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